As Line Editor at Crimson Leaf Publishing, I have evaluated *The Starfall Accord*, Chapter 3. My focus is on the rhythmic economy of the prose and the rigid adherence to the established character voice signatures.

### 1. STRENGTHS TO PRESERVE
*   **Tactile Sensations:** The prose effectively anchors Mira’s POV in physical feeling, matching her voice profile. 
    *   *Example:* "The silence... was a thick, mercury-heavy stillness that hummed with the phantom frequency of his heart."
*   **Dorian’s Formalism:** Dorian’s dialogue consistently uses the "Suboptimal Scale."
    *   *Example:* “My rest was... suboptimal. The atmospheric noise of this volcano is quite significant.”
*   **The Somatic Mechanic:** The description of the "somatic bleed" (feeling his cold because he is terrified) is a sophisticated way to handle the internal fantasy logic without a data dump.
*   **Voice Signature Adherence:** 
    *   **Mira:** YES. Use of "past and rot" for high-stakes anger and "obviously" as sarcasm are perfectly placed. Her "verb-first" dialogue pattern (e.g., "Enter, Dorian. Obviously.") is distinct.
    *   **Dorian:** YES. His reliance on "the evidence suggests" and "not auspicious" maintains his "Absolute Zero" persona.

### 2. MUST-FIX — CONTINUITY
*   **Somatic Feedback Loop:** In Chapter 2/RAG context, Mira’s touch provides a "balm." In this chapter, the text says: "He was absorbing the surge, filtering my chaos through his absolute zero and grounding it into the stone floor." 
    *   *Issue:* The RAG states Mira’s *emotions* physically override his affinity. The draft suggests he is the one in control of the filtering.
    *   *Correction:* Adjust the phrasing to show the *interaction* is autonomous, rather than Dorian actively "filtering."
*   **Visual Branding:** The RAG states Dorian has a "healing thermal burn on right hand." The draft mentions he is wearing a scorched cuff from the day before.
    *   *Issue:* If the burn is on his hand, a "scorched cuff" on the wrist wouldn't hide the brand mentioned in the final line.
    *   *Correction:* Ensure the "obsidian line" at the end is clearly a *new* result of this specific contact, distinct from the previous day's burn.

### 3. MUST-FIX — CLARITY
*   **The "Tectonic Vice" Metaphor:** 
    *   *Passage:* "...all it did was make my head feel like it was being squeezed in a tectonic vice."
    *   *Fix:* ORIGINAL → SUGGESTED: "tectonic vice" → "tectonic vise." A "vice" is a moral failing; a "vise" is the gripping tool. This is a common homophone error that breaks immersion.
*   **The Proximity Logic:** 
    *   *Passage:* "I stopped three feet from his desk and shoved the maps toward him... ‘The floor plans.’"
    *   *Fix:* In the next paragraph, they are "three feet" apart, yet his fingers are approaching hers. Unless he has four-foot arms, Mira needs to lean in or step closer to bridge the gap for the "white-hot distortion" to trigger.

### 4. OPTIONAL SUGGESTIONS
*   **Economy of Adjectives:** 
    *   *Passage:* "the bruised, angry red of the dawn"
    *   *Suggestion:* OPTIONAL. "The bruised dawn" or "The angry dawn." Using both "bruised" and "angry" to modify "red" creates a rhythmic logjam. 
*   **Dialogue Tag Auditing:**
    *   *Passage:* "“Chancellor,” Kaelen said, his voice flat."
    *   *Suggestion:* OPTIONAL. Kaelen's character is "Deeply Suspicious" (RAG). "Kaelen said, his voice flat" is a bit pedestrian. ORIGINAL → SUGGESTED: "Kaelen stood there, voice like a low-burning wick."

### 5. FORBIDDEN CHANGES / NON-GOALS
*   **Mira’s "Past and Rot":** Do not "clean up" her cursing. It is a specific emotional thermometer required by the Style Guide.
*   **Dorian’s "Evidence Suggests":** Do not replace this with "I think" or "It seems." His detachment is a defensive mechanism that must remain rigid until the final chapters.
*   **Sentence Fragments:** Mira’s fragmented thoughts ("We could — actually. No.") are intentional markers of her excitement and should not be corrected to formal grammar.

### 6. VERDICT: POLISH NEEDED
The chapter is strong and the voices are incredibly distinct, but the "vise/vice" error and the arm-length proximity issue in the desk scene require a quick polish for logic and spelling.

**LOG:** Line editing complete. Voice signatures verified. Ready for final refinement.