### 1. STRENGTHS TO PRESERVE
*   **The Sarah/Marcus Parallelism:** The use of technical jargon to describe biological trauma is exceptionally strong. It bridges the gap between their corporate past and their survivalist present. Specifically: *"You can’t pull a load through a bottleneck that hasn't been cleared... You’re just increasing the friction."* This perfectly mirrors Sarah’s [voice-sig] of using support jargon to process reality.
*   **Character Deconstruction:** David’s collapse from "Indiana Pioneer" to "Terrified Corporate Refugee" is earned. His fumbling with Arthur’s "logic" (the cardinal directions) underscores his failure to truly inhabit the legacy he's trying to claim.
*   **Tactile Internalization:** The description of the birth is visceral and avoids being "clean." The "slurry of fluid and blood" soaking into "Chicago-bought denim" is a potent image of the high-tech/low-life theme.
*   **Voice Signature Check:**
    *   **Sarah:** **YES.** Her transition from the "polished Texas lilt" to "clipped tech-lead cadence" is consistent with her profile. Lines like *"I didn't bring you this far to delete you"* are quintessential Sarah.
    *   **David:** **YES.** His reliance on "North-by-Northwest" is a desperate, failed mimicry of Arthur's voice signature, which highlights his current state of "Processing Error."
    *   **Marcus:** **YES.** Even in silence, his "the rhythmic four-beat sequence" (though performed by David in a moment of sympathetic mirror-trauma) and his "God-tier" observation from the doorway fit the profile.

### 2. MUST-FIX — CONTINUITY
*   **The Inverter Hum:** The opening paragraph mentions the "solar inverter" and "server shed" as being ten yards away. Later, Marcus is "holding his ruggedized tablet" in the doorway. 
    *   *The Error:* Ch-11 [character-state] lists the location as "The Barn / Cattle Pen." If Marcus is in the server shed, he shouldn't be able to see the minute details of Sarah's "empathy protocols rewritten in blood" from that distance during a storm surge. 
    *   *The Correction:* Place Marcus at the perimeter of the *pen* or the barn door, not the server shed. He needs to be close enough to smell the copper for the emotional beat to land.
*   **Status of Arthur’s Tools:** The text mentions "chains David had dropped."
    *   *The Error:* Per [character-state], Arthur’s veterinary kit is "analog." While chains are used in livestock, ensure they are described as part of the "Vance Legacy Kit" to tie back to the [World State] obligations.

### 3. MUST-FIX — CLARITY
*   **The "Four-Beat Sequence":** 
    *   *The Passage:* "His hands... were vibrating in a rhythmic four-beat cycle... It was the same tremor she’d seen in Marcus’s fingers."
    *   *The Problem:* This is a very specific [voice-sig] for Marcus (his "ping" to stay grounded). Having David do it now feels like a POV leak or a psychic connection rather than a character trait. 
    *   *The Fix:* Change David’s tremor to something more "pioneer-failing"—clutching the rails until his knuckles bleed, or fumbling the mineral oil. Keep the "four-beat sequence" exclusive to Marcus to maintain his unique silhouette.
*   **The "Leak" Metaphor:** 
    *   *The Passage:* “Now get the bucket; we have a leak to plug.”
    *   *The Problem:* Ending on this line is confusing. Are they plugging a literal leak in the barn, or is this a metaphor for the heifer’s post-birth hemorrhaging? 
    *   *The Fix:* Clarify if the heifer is bleeding out. If it's a medical emergency, the urgency needs to be immediate. Change to: *"Now get the clamps; she's hemorrhaging. We have a leak to plug."*

### 4. OPTIONAL SUGGESTIONS
*   **The Solar Inverter (Instructional):** Contrast the "high-frequency vibration" of the inverter more sharply with the "guttural groan" of the heifer. It heightens the theme of the digital world's indifference to biological suffering.
*   **Sarah's Manual Intervention:** Mention the abrasions on her forearms (noted in the Character State) as she pulls her arms out of the heifer. It grounds the "Status: Obstructed" internal narration in physical pain.

### 5. FORBIDDEN CHANGES / NON-GOALS
*   **Do NOT "fix" the technical metaphors.** The comparison of a birth to "clearing the buffer" or "de-allocating space" is the soul of this project’s voice. It must remain jarring.
*   **Do NOT soften Sarah’s "brutal" efficiency.** Her slap to the calf’s ribs and her "Acknowledge" command to David are essential to her arc of becoming a "Physical Arbiter."

### 6. VERDICT: REVISE
The chapter is structurally sound with a clear **Want** (save the calf), **Obstacle** (malpresentation/David’s breakdown), and **Outcome** (biological success/psychological shift). However, the **Must-Fix** on the location of the server shed/Marcus’s POV distance and the appropriation of Marcus's specific physical tic by David must be addressed to maintain character integrity and spatial logic.