Hello, I’m Devon. Let’s look at the "structure" of the house you’re building.

Chapter 2 is a foundational moment for *The Starfall Accord*. We have the "Collision" beat—the moment the two worlds literally and figuratively smash together. You’ve established a clear sensory contrast between the two leads, which is essential for a "Fire vs. Ice" trope. However, the structural load-bearing of the scene is slightly lopsided, specifically regarding the stakes of their physical contact.

Here is my developmental assessment:

### 1. STRENGTHS
*   **Sensory Contrast:** You do an excellent job of making the magic feel physical rather than just visual. Lines like *"a low, tectonic grind that vibrated up through the soles of her feet"* and *"ice is just water that's stopped trying"* establish the elemental and philosophical divide perfectly.
*   **The Hook:** The opening image of the glass "groaning" under atmospheric pressure is high-stakes and immediate. It anchors us in Mira’s perspective and her defensive posture before a single word is spoken.
*   **Character Voice:** Dorian’s dialogue is sharp and reflects his magic. His fixation on "physics" and "efficiency" versus Mira’s "unbridled energy" sets the stage for a classic "Order vs. Chaos" romantic conflict.

### 2. CONCERNS
*   **The "Want" is Muddied (Structural):**
    *   *The Problem:* In a strong chapter, the protagonist needs a clear "Want." Here, Mira wants to protect her school's autonomy, but she gives up the North Wing nearly immediately after a single ley line flare-up.
    *   *The Fix:* Make the negotiation feel like a tactical loss for her. Instead of just ending on him saying "I expect the keys," have Mira realize that to save the school, she has to sacrifice something that hurts—perhaps a specific project in those alchemy labs—so the reader feels the *weight* of her defeat.

*   **The Emotional Leap (Pacing):**
    *   *The Problem:* The transition from "I hate you" to "Match my pulse" happens very quickly. The physical contact (Dorian grabbing her arm) is a major romance beat, but it feels more like a Plot Device to stop the ceiling from falling than an Emotional Beat.
    *   *The Quote:* *"Match my pulse. Rhythm, Mira. Not force."*
    *   *The Fix:* Slow this down. Give us one beat of Mira’s internal resistance where she considers letting the building shake rather than touching him. The "Slow Burn" requires the characters to be repelled by the very thing they are forced to do. Highlight the *visceral* reaction to his coldness before she yields.

*   **The Outcome/Closing (Structural):**
    *   *The Problem:* The chapter ends with a bit of a "fade out." We know Dorian is moving in, but we don't have a specific "Tick-Tock" or a looming threat to pull us into Chapter 3.
    *   *The Fix:* The "crack" of ice at the end is good, but the "Result" of the chapter should be a new, more difficult status quo. Have Mira realize that by syncing their magic, they have inadvertently created a permanent bond or a "leak" in the academy's power that she now has to hide or fix. Give us a specific problem she has to solve tomorrow morning.

### 3. VERDICT

**REVISE**

**Reasoning:** The chapter successfully introduces the hero and the primary conflict, but it settles the "Territory" dispute too cleanly. The "Want" (Defend the school) and the "Outcome" (Losing the North Wing) need to feel more like a painful compromise. Additionally, the emotional impact of their magic syncing needs more internal processing from Mira to ensure the romance feels "earned" rather than forced by the architecture of the plot.

**Focus for Revision:**
1.  Amplify Mira's internal resistance during the "syncing" scene.
2.  Clearly define what she loses (the cost) by giving up the North Wing.
3.  Sharpen the cliffhanger: What is the *immediate* danger of him being in the room next to hers? (e.g., Can she now hear his thoughts? Is her magic reacting to his presence even through the walls?)