To: Facilitator
From: Cora, Continuity & Accuracy Editor
Date: October 24, 202X
Subject: Editorial Review: ch-13 "The Taxmaster"

I have reviewed the text for the thirteenth chapter of *Cypress Bend*. My focus remains exclusively on the internal logic, character facts, and world-building consistency.

### 1. STRENGTHS
*   **Technological Continuity:** The description of the "modified surveyor’s transit" with a "focused microwave emitter" (lines 9-11) aligns perfectly with Elena’s established background as a hardware specialist. The distinction between "frying" and "jamming" (lines 38-41) maintains the grounded, technical realism established in early chapters regarding her tactical preferences.
*   **Geographic Fact-Checking:** The mention of "Mariposa County" (line 22) and "Cypress Bend" (line 26) is consistent with the established setting.
*   **Vehicular Persistence:** Elena’s 1994 Bronco (line 5) remains her primary mode of transport. The detail of the "false floor" (line 52) is a consistent detail for her character’s clandestine operations.

### 2. CONCERNS

**A. CRITICAL: The Sarah Discrepancy (Flag: Character Identity/State)**
*   **The Contradiction:** Toward the end of the chapter, Elena receives an encrypted message from "**Sarah**" regarding a shipment and the bridge (line 74).
*   **The Conflict:** Chapter 3 established that Elena’s primary contact and sister-in-arms is **Sloane**. Chapter 7 established that **Sarah** was a tertiary character who was "decommissioned" or left the group during the failed raid on the server farm.
*   **Impact:** Using the wrong name for the primary contact breaks the central relationship continuity of the resistance cell. If this is a new Sarah, it is an unnamed/unestablished contact; if it’s a mistake for Sloane, it’s a major narrative error.

**B. MAJOR: The Bridge Surveillance Timeline (Flag: Chronology)**
*   **The Contradiction:** Elena says, "The real war was at the bridge, where the state was installing a 'smart' checkpoint... If that bridge went live, Cypress Bend would become a cage" (lines 78-79).
*   **The Conflict:** Chapter 11 established in the "Project Overview" dialogue that the state's Bio-Metric Gate (the checkpoint) at the bridge **voted to go live forty-eight hours prior** to the events of this chapter.
*   **Impact:** Elena is speaking as though the installation is currently in progress or imminent ("If that bridge went live"), whereas Chapter 11 indicated the system is already operational and the "cage" is already closed.

**C. MINOR: Battery Heat Physics (Flag: World Logic)**
*   **The Contradiction:** "The heat from the battery pack in her lap began to bleed through her jeans..." (line 44).
*   **The Conflict:** In Chapter 5, Elena famously complained about her experimental lithium-sulfur packs being "cold-sinked" and incapable of venting heat externally without a specific liquid-cooling mod.
*   **Impact:** Small discrepancy in the hardware's physical properties. If she is using the high-drain rig from the medical imaging unit, it should be overheating/venting as described here, but it contradicts her previous dialogue about her personal gear's thermal signature.

**D. AMBIGUITY: Solar Array Timeline**
*   "the unpermitted solar array she’d helped him wire **last Tuesday**" (line 4).
*   In the established timeline, last Tuesday was the day of the "Blackout" event in the city. Chapter 4 established Elena was in the city hiding from a patrol that entire day. She could not have been wiring a farm in Cypress Bend simultaneously.

### 3. VERDICT

**VERDICT: Minor flags (bordering on Major due to name error)**

While the chapter is narratively strong, I cannot grant a "Clean" status. The naming of **Sarah vs. Sloane** is a fundamental character continuity error. Furthermore, the **Bridge Status** contradicts the ticking-clock established in Chapter 11. These must be rectified to ensure the reader perceives the resistance as being under immediate, active threat from a system that is already live, rather than one that is merely "installing."

**Action items:** 
1. Reconcile Sarah/Sloane.
2. Align the bridge status with the Chapter 11 "Go-Live" date.
3. Check "last Tuesday" against the established event calendar.