**EDITORIAL REVIEW: CH-10**
**Editor:** Cora, Continuity & Accuracy Editor
**Project:** The Starfall Accord

---

### 1. STRENGTHS TO PRESERVE
*   **Physical State Consistency:** The description of Dorian’s "nerve-scorch" and "flayed" sensation aligns perfectly with the physical toll established in Ch-04’s [character-state].
*   **Environmental Persistence:** The "Transition Stasis" (frozen steam monument) is correctly identified as a permanent landmark, maintaining the world-state rule established in Ch-04.
*   **Relationship Anchoring:** The "Battery and the Lens" synergy and the biological necessity of Mira’s proximity (as established in the Ch-04 permanent arc changes) are well-represented in the line: "The tether wasn’t just a spiritual bond anymore; it felt like a biological imperative."
*   **Character Voice Check:**
    *   **Mira:** YES. Her "cracked reed" whisper and focus on the immediate physical/spiritual bond is consistent with her post-depletion vulnerability.
    *   **Dorian:** YES. His internal monologue maintains his focus on sensory overload and the loss of his "absolute zero" mental fortress.

---

### 2. MUST-FIX — CONTINUITY
*   **CHAPTER NUMBER DISCREPANCY:** The provided text is labeled "ch-10," but the content describes the immediate aftermath of the Sparring Arena disaster. 
    *   **The Error:** Chapter 04’s [character-state] and [world-state] describe these exact events (Aric screaming, Elara comatose, the Ministry Observers in the gallery) as having just occurred in Chapter 04. If this is Chapter 10, the story has not moved forward in time or location since the end of Chapter 04.
    *   **The Correction:** Relabel this text as Chapter 05 or explain the six-chapter gap where no time has passed.
*   **CHARACTER LOCATION INCONSISTENCY:** 
    *   **The Error:** The chapter states: "Lyra was further back... as she knelt over the comatose form of Elara." However, Ch-04 [character-state] lists Lyra’s location as "tending to Elara" in the Sparring Arena. While the location is the same, Ch-04 notes Lyra is documenting the "exact moment the Starfall pocket inverted." The text says she is "logging the reading" now, suggesting this is happening simultaneously with the Ch-04 ending.
    *   **The Correction:** Ensure the narrative acknowledges this is the immediate *continuation* of the Ch-04 scene, or resolve why they are still on the floor in the exact same positions six chapters later.
*   **MIRAL'S MANA STATUS:**
    *   **The Error:** Text says Mira's mana is "completely drained into the Paradox they had just birthed." 
    *   **The Correction:** Direct alignment with Ch-04 is good, but if this is Ch-10, the "Open loop" regarding "Mira/Dorian 'Binary Star' stability" must be addressed or referenced as a reason she cannot recover.

---

### 3. MUST-FIX — CLARITY
*   **PASSAGE:** "It was a permanent scar on the world, a testament to their failure to remain separate."
    *   **The Fix:** This implies "their failure" caused the stasis, but Ch-04 established that the stasis was a result of the "Paradox" spell used to *save* the students. Clarify that the "failure" refers to their inability to maintain their individual magical barriers, not a failure of the spell's intent.
*   **PASSAGE:** "...the redirected silence of the arena."
    *   **The Fix:** "Redirected" is ambiguous here. Does it refer to a specific spell effect or a psychological state? If it refers to the silence following the explosion, "heavy" or "ringing" is clearer.

---

### 4. OPTIONAL SUGGESTIONS
*   **Medical Restoration Debt:** (Optional) Reference Dorian’s technical "debt" to Aric/Elara as established in Ch-04 [character-state]. Watching Aric scream would be a logical moment for Dorian to feel the weight of the "unpaid" medical restoration obligation.
*   **Spectacle Detail:** (Optional) Since Lyra’s spectacles were noted as "fogged/cracked" in Ch-04, the detail is consistent here. No change needed, just noting for continuity strength.

---

### 5. FORBIDDEN CHANGES / NON-GOALS
*   **Sensory Overload Language:** Do not tone down the descriptions of "flayed" skin or "scorched nerves." These are accurate to the established somatic threshold limits for Dorian.
*   **The Ministry’s Silence:** Do not add dialogue for the Observers. Their "terrifying silence" is an established faction attitude (Hostile/Appalled) and should remain atmospheric.
*   **Mira’s Weight:** Do not make Mira more active. Her state of "total mana depletion" from Ch-04 must be respected; she remains "dead weight."

---

### 6. VERDICT

**REVISE**

The text itself is a high-quality continuation of the scene, but labeling it **Chapter 10** while it is clearly the immediate aftermath of **Chapter 04** creates a major continuity break in the timeline. We cannot have a six-chapter gap where the characters remain on the floor in the same positions. This must be reconciled with the project index.